Being a single dad with no significant other, my child and I spend 100% of our time together. Let’s say 50% together and 50% of the time we’re together but each is doing our own thing. When we add that significant other, that percentage is reduced. We are selfish beings who will put our own wants and needs above our children, we do have our own lives and many would argue we must have a companion in some form. Many people often rush right back into a relationship. Our children have just been through divorce, their family has changed. They need us, they need to believe that everything will be okay and we will still be a family. During our search for and then our courtship of a companion, at times, will isolate our children. We have to work on this new relationship, molding it, possibly adding this new person into our lives and taking time away from the children. How do we balance that? Now we have 33% of our time set aside for this new companion, 33% for our children and 33% for ourselves, which we use the majority of that time to spend with our new found friend or love. Do our children now get 33% of our time or is it less? Now in this new relationship, you decide to have another child and your non-traditional family has changed again. I can’t begin to think of the psyche of a child or children and what they will go through. Now how much time are you really spending with each child?
Most need the companionship but for now, my child is my companion. My child is # 1 when at my house. Probably over spoiled, I’m laying down the law but our time is so enjoyable together. We talk and talk, I like to teach them and show them the ways of the world. Watch them grow and find out who they are. I love being a parent at my age. I don’t want that time reduced. I will be very careful adding that someone into our lives. You need to consider the time you have to spend.